The Keys to Happiness

The happiest people are those who find cause to stay upbeat.  If you haven’t been taught “happiness skills,” then now is a good time to teach yourself.  The happiness you seek is all a state of mind.

Research has shown that 90% of the thoughts you have today are the same thoughts that you had yesterday. That does not mean, however, that you can’t have a greater percentage of positive thoughts. It is possible to rewire your brain for happiness.

Being happy is sought after in all cultures and has even generated college courses in “Positive Psychology.”  These “happiness” psychologists believe you can be happier if you live in the present moment, have gratitude for all the positives in your life and are able to recognize the beauty of nature.

Staying in the present moment involves refusing to believe every thought you have.  Many of your thoughts may be based on the past or false expectations appearing real (also known as FEAR).  Do not allow these types of thoughts to inhibit the present moment.  Choose how you react from your heart.

Staying present also involves focusing on who you are in terms of your character strengths, goals, and what gives meaning to your life. Know who you are.  Define yourself by making a list of your character strengths, perhaps with assistance from your closest friends, and what you believe your values to be.   Are you kind, fair, supportive, loyal?

Give yourself credit for living up to those character traits.  Negative judgments are conditioning from parents, family, friends and culture. Place your attention on the good in you and be happy with who you are.  Love yourself so that you do not lose your boundaries or become codependent .

Choose how you will view setbacks and tragedies and adjust to new circumstances.  You can choose to focus your attention on happier, more positive thoughts.   Remember, the idea of who you are is not dependent on your circumstances.  Focus on what your strengths are and work to use your strength and abilities to move you forward.

If you tend to compare yourself to others, choose how much and with whom you compare yourself and about what.  If income and material goods are your measure of comparison on the happiness scale, know that an increased standard of living does not bring happiness. Once your basic needs are met, any additional income will not increase your happiness with life.

Develop an attitude of gratitude that focuses on noticing all the positive things in your life, including the small ones.  What did you think, see, feel, taste, hear or smell that brought you pleasure, joy, or feeling good about who you are?  Studies have shown that those who take time daily to write down the positive things from the day are happier.

Take time to “smell the roses.”  In other words, spend time in nature.  Nothing is more grounding than being like a child, barefoot in the grass.  When you are grounded, you are able to run off your stress and look at life more objectively and less emotionally.

Every day you have many opportunities to focus on the present, the beauty around you, and

the good in your life.  Don’t wait to be happy in the future, for the future is now.